Ten Things of Thankful, Week 03/2019

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 03/2019

So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

  • The weather changed from chilly, wet and cloudy to cold, dry and sunny. I like this so much! Yesterday we bundled up and had a wonderful walk with our friend, her dog and a dog from the shelter. I felt like I was bathed in lots of light.
  • On Boxing Day last year, another dog was found abandoned in front of the shelter. But this time, thankfully the former owners were caught and will have to pay for it. Sadly, this rarely happens. And of course, this doesn’t help Buddy (this is how the staff named the dog), but maybe his former owner learns from this – that throwing away pets like trash is indeed a crime, and hopefully this will have a lasting impact on their conscience. I hope something good will come from this sad event.
  • My mother had more dental surgery on Friday, and everything went well. I am grateful for that!
  • I got a very nasty cold this week, but also lots of support. My husband encouraged me to take it easy, my doctor gave me some pills – so I didn’t have to buy them – and our pets were very patient with me.
  • On Tuesday was my yearly visit with my OB/Gyn. Everything went well, and I was very relieved to hear that. I will have a mammo/sono later in September, but I will deal with this later.
  • Wednesday I discussed my latest blood work with my doctor. The results were mixed, my blood sugar is great, but my liver is stressed by either the new pain killer or the new psychotropic drug. But it’s nothing I have to deal with now, it can wait until next month. And I am thankful my blood sugar is ok!
  • Thursday I went to my dentist, I need a new bite guard. I was coughing a lot, and I just hoped for a break while the impression was made… And I was lucky! Another thing I got out of the way.
  • I didn’t go to OT on Thursday because I felt bad from my cold. This made me feel like I had somehow failed, but I am glad I was able to take care of myself.
  • Thursday and Friday I was too tired to walk the dogs. This made me feel bad, but my health needs to come first. Well, I learned this much, I guess. And the dogs are fine.
  • My husband was given Red Fire shrimps by his brother for the fish tank in our living room. They look so pretty and add even more life. We enjoy sitting and watching, and my husband is by no means finished. It’s so nice to see this former eyesore becoming such a pretty sight.
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Ten Things of Thankful, Week 02/2019

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 02/2019

So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

  • It was our 24th wedding anniversary. I am very thankful that we got this far – through good and bad times. This is not always easy, but both of us agree that a marriage is something worth fighting for.
  • My husband got a nasty cold with lots of coughing, which made our nights really difficult. I tried to help him through this, and it seems he is finally on the mend – I am grateful for that.
  • On Saturday, my husband stayed at home while I was walking our dogs together with our friend and her dog. We had a tricky situation when we went down a really busy street. I was pleasantly surprised that our nervous dog Sam stayed near me and didn’t even try to attack other people – the same situation was very difficult in October. Yay, success!
    I felt Sam and I really built a connection during those last three months. When we walk the dogs together, I take care of Janet, and my husband has Sam. But the dogs are by now also used to walking just with me on a daily basis. And this finally seems to pay off. I feel very honored that he starts to trust me.
  • I also was a little proud of myself that I learned to handle those situations on my own now. This is not always the case, Sam’s behavior still is and will be unpredictable, but I don’t feel so overwhelmed by it.
  • We went to the Vet with Janet for her yearly checkup. She may be ten years old, but she is still in good health. We liked to hear that.
  • I noticed the days are becoming longer. What a relief. I can deal with cold weather, but the darkness sometimes adds to my depression. But more light is a promise spring will come some day.
  • Helped my parents with their laptop, which acted really weird… To be honest, I didn’t understand everything and I don’t know Windows 10 as well as Windows 7, but I found a solution for almost everything. I am glad I could help and that everything works now.
  • Talked to my mother yesterday, and it seems she deals very well with her brother’s death. I was very glad to hear this.
  • Found a new recipe for delicous wraps we both like. Sometimes it’s good to add something new to the menu.
  • OT started again, and it was great to meet all the patients and my therapist again. We agreed on a new group project, everybody will make a mosaic on a canvas, and all four parts put together will form a compass rose. I am looking forward to it!
Ten Things of Thankful, Week 01/2019

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 01/2019

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So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

  • I am very grateful for the new year. 2018 was very exhausting, even though I learned a lot. Let’s hope 2019 will go easy on me.
  • It was sad we had to go to my uncle’s funeral on Wednesday, but this brought up so many things to be thankful for as well. First, I felt very honored that I was invited to the funeral, because there had been times when our families completely fell out of touch. Even though these times are over, things had been tricky and I am glad we all were able to put the past aside for now.
  • I was so thankful to have my father by my side at the funeral. It must have been hard for him to go to another funeral, because he had to say goodbye to three friends in 2018. But we can always count on him. Not only did he help my mother and me through this, he also knew exactly what to say to my aunt and my cousin as well.
  • I am so grateful for my mother. My brother was her last sibling, but she tried to console my aunt, my cousin and me. She is such a caring person. She thanked my father and me that we were by her side – of course we were.
  • When we stood at the grave and the coffin was ready to be lowered into the ground, we were asked to say the Lord’s Prayer for my uncle. This was a powerful experience, I felt we all were united by praying together. I am grateful I could be a part of this.
  • While listening to the funeral speaker, love for my uncle felt my heart, and I recognized I have a choice: Stay resentful and bitter, or forgive those who have hurt me. After all, I never walked in their shoes. So I started with forgiving my uncle, and my heart felt like a huge weight have been lifted. It was the right thing to do, and I am thankful for this experience.
  • After the funeral, we all were invited to a restaurant where my uncle liked to eat. Two hours later, everybody left feeling happy, even my aunt and my cousin. I know they will grieve for a long time, but for a moment they were comforted by having all of us around them, remembering my uncle.
  • When I got home after the funeral, I was very thankful that my husband and the pets were alright.
  • Before I went to the funeral I felt very bad and had panic attacks. I am so glad I went anyway! I felt so much better afterwards.
  • My husband didn’t work from Christmas to New Year. We enjoyed having time together. The fish tank in the living room is not finished yet, but we put the first fish in it. We like to sit in front of it and just watch, it’s so entertaining.
Ten Things of Thankful, Week 50/2018

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 50/2018

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So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

  • Once more I kept up my new daily routine. It was not always easy, but I pulled through, and I am thankful for that.
  • I felt a little bit of self-confidence last week – this was missing for a long time in my life. Don’t know how long this will last, but it sure feels nice!
  • It snowed for the first time this winter. Even better: This happened on the weekend, so my husband and I could enjoy this magic together while taking a long walk with our dogs.
  • My husband continued to work on the fish tank in our living room, and now there are plants and snails in it. Watching this little world come to life makes us both smile.
  • We have all presents for Christmas! Thinking about the joy they will hopefully bring makes my heart swell.
  • I will go to a charity event at another shelter with a friend in February. It’s always nice to spend time with her, so I am looking forward to it.
  • My brother in law said he has a notebook for me (the company he works for give them away for free after they have been used for a few years. So it is not new, but it will work. That’s good, because my notebook is seven years old now and starts to fail). I am glad I don’t have to buy another one.
  • My mother and I planned the dinner on Christmas Eve. We will have two kinds of Fondue, and everyone is looking forward to it!
  • I found a new recipe for noodle casserole we both like. It can easily be made from scratch, just as my husband likes it.
  • So far, the streets have been ok and not frozen. That’s good, because my husband drives to work early, often before the winter service de-ices the roads.
Ten Things of Thankful, Week 49/2018

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 49/2018

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So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

  • Another week in which I kept up my new routine. I am very thankful for that!
  • Chores felt a little bit easier this week. I hope there is still room for improvement, but it made me feel less panicky and overwhelmed.
  • I found my rhythm while walking the dogs or working in the house, so I stopped constantly checking the time. That doesn’t make my work easier and it doesn’t make my back ache less, but it reduces my stress level significantly.
  • On Saturday my husband walked the dogs without me, because someone had to wait for the post man. At first I was a little bit sad, because I couldn’t spend time with my pack, but then I took the opportunity and started organizing documents, scanning my medical records and so on. I am not finished yet, but I managed to get a lot done.
  • I have to admit there was a lot of documents to organize… So I am very thankful nothing really bad happened while I was not able to look after it. This can really backfire.
  • While I was at it, I also started to prepare our next tax decleration, which I want to do in February or March. I will be thankful for my preparations then!
  • Yesterday one of our dogs – Sam – got in a fight with another dog. It was really bad and we couldn’t stop them right away, so I am very grateful nobody was hurt.
  • Last week was quiet, and I enjoyed this immensely. I needed this me time.
  • My husband bought new plants for the fish tank in our living room. Hopefully they soon will start to grow. But it already makes everything look nicer.
  • It rained a lot, and it is so good to watch the little rivers in the forests come back after the long dry months.
Ten Things of Thankful, Week 48/2018

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 48/2018

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So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

  • Another week in which I managed to keep up my new routines. I hope my brain will finally get it one day 🙂
  • This week was not so filled up with appointments as the week before. This was a blessing, because I could relax and calm down.
  • Met with a friend on Thursday and we made Christmas cookies – lots and lots of them! Later her daughter (she is eleven years old) joined us after school. We had so much fun together.
  • After the new baby in my husband’s family re-opened so many wounds in my soul, I wasn’t sure how being with my friend and her daughter would make me feel. But I needn’t have worried – it was a wonderful day, full of good talks, warmth and friendship.
  • We ended up with so many cookies, I gave almost half of them to my parents. They were absolutely thrilled and agreed with us the cookies were delicious. I am glad I made my parents happy.
  • Went shopping for clothes yesterday with my mother (this will be my Christmas present from my parents). I was very glad I could spend some extra money on clothes, and we found very nice things.
  • My mother and I had a wonderful time. We weren’t in any hurry, talked a lot and even had the time to sit down and have a cup of coffee. My mother still works full time, so these moments are rare. We both enjoy them very much.
  • I had a very intense therapy session on Friday morning with my therapist. It became obvious that I gained a lot of insight into my depression in the past weeks, and that I can handle it much better now compared to a few months ago. I am sure that will help me in the future.
  • Went ahead with my decluttering project this weekend and decided to donate much more clothes I don’t wear anymore to charity. It was very hard this time to let go, but I think it will be good to get rid of things that only remind me of a past that doesn’t exist anymore. It will help me to focus on the present.
  • Today we lit the first candle on our Advent arrangement. This is always a very special moment. And I am very thankful we found such a nice arrangement at the shelter’s charity event. It will make us smile all the way until Christmas!

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Ten Things of Thankful, Week 47/2018

Ten Things of Thankful, Week 47/2018

So I proudly join the TToT-community again. Let’s see what I can contribute:

1.) Another week in which I managed to keep up my new routine. I am thankful I could keep my self destructive impulses at bay.

2.) It was a busy and hard week, but I managed to keep my appointments and got everything done. It’s nice to have a tidy home to come home to in the evening when you are tired.

3.) We started to clean the fish tank in our living room. It annoyed me that I try my best to keep everything tidy, and that the fish tank looks so bad. We are not finished yet, but we are getting there.

4.) Cleaning the fish tank together with my husband made me feel good. I missed working with him, it reminds me of happy times in the past before depression hit. Maybe we can get a little bit of this spirit back.

5.) Talked to my pain doctor, and she said I did everything right (she was referring to quitting opiates and walking without the walker). She also pointed out that the pain I am dealing with at the moment may be due to the fact that I still have to adjust to my more active lifestyle now, and that I have to become stronger. Muscles atrophy very quickly, and rebuilding them can take months. She said I should just keep on doing what I am doing.

6.) We helped preparing the barn at the shelter for a charity event. It felt good to be able to help.

7.) At the charity event, we bought a very nice Advent arrangement. We are now almost set for Christmas time, I just have to decorate a few more things.

8.) The smell of fresh Advent arrangements always helps me to get into a festive pre-Christmas mood. We don’t have a Christmas tree, because we are afraid our pets would climb into it or destroy it, but arrangements are a must!

9.) I picked up my decluttering project again and threw away some more things. I am in no hurry, but I will continue when I have the time. It’s painful to let things go, but it’s good to have everything in order.

10.) We found nice dog beds for our living room. This looks far more nicer than the blankets, but our dogs are very picky (in fact, Sam decided he wanted to have this dog bed by jumping on it in the store, and we followed his lead – our pets trained us very well. At least it was not expensive, and we have to admit Sam has good taste).