Wednesday I tried to make the next step. My plan was to meet with the little niece outside the family gatherings, because meeting many people adds to the stress.
My husband and the in-laws really tried to accomodate me. Everybody wanted to make this possible. It was hard for me to accept so much help, but I tried to help them in the past as well. And I am of course aware of the fact that everybody needs help sometimes.
I went through a lot of feelings that day, and I shed a few tears as well. And on the next day I still felt very rattled. But after that, I calmed down. It wasn’t so bad that I couldn’t handle it. But maybe my goal to at least be a part of the family festivities is realistic. And maybe it becomes easier with time.
My next goal will be to go to the Christmas brunch held by the parents-in-law on boxing day.
The pain that we will won’t have children will not just vanish. But I don’t want it to destroy my life. I will see what is possible. But I will continue to find my own way.
Viola's Daily Musings 
That was a terrific first step and I’m pretty sure you can do it, nope, I’m very sure you can do it.
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Thanks! The first step is often the most difficult, so I hope it will become easier.
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I agree with Brian. It’s a brilliant step, Viola, and for what it’s worth, I think you did brilliantly. It can’t be easy but you survived, and you will do again for the Christmas brunch on Boxing Day. We know you can do it so I hope you believe that, too. You’ve got this ♥
Caz xx
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Thanks! It helps so much to hear that other people trust me to deal with it. Right now, I feel good about tomorrow. We will see 😉
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Hugs to you, you are in my prayers as you deal with these hard things.
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Thanks! It may be hard to deal with these things, but not dealing with them makes everything worse in my opinion.
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